Right, let’s just get one thing out of the way before I begin. This is the fastest and maddest muther fukkin scooter I’ve ever had the pleasure of propelling down the road. It will destroy the Yamaha T-Max in a straight line and devour BMW’s 650 range as well, which is actually a Kymco wearing Lederhosen clothes. So, for that reason alone, everyone should own a SRV850 during his or her life span.
But we have one big problem now because the Aprilia SVR850 is no longer available in South Africa due to poor sales when it was released a few years ago - shame that. But I managed to tear, and I mean tear, around on this used example for a week and if I won tons of cash I’d stick this in my garage faster than I would Jessica Biel wearing a mini-skirt, if you know what I mean, or maybe not?
To be honest though the Aprilia SRV850 is more of an automatic motorbike than a ‘proper’ scooter, in the sense of the word, which is a good thing because of the quality components it’s made from, like…
It has a monster 90-degree V-twin motor (that no other scooter has) which actually displaces 839cc, is liquid-cooled, has four-valves per cylinder and makes a hysterical 76hp@7,750rpm and 76Nm@6,000rpm, good enough for yer? Enough to project this hyper cool machine to over 200km/h two up, yes you read that correctly, because when I took Natalie (SuperBike editor) on the back she jabbed me in the ribs like a possessed lobster when the speedo became so vulgar. On your own you’re going to see around the 220km/h mark staring at you from the superb instrument array, fuk yeah! This was all achieved in its ‘sports’ mode that you can easily select from the right hand switchgear and I did so all of the time, wouldn’t you too? At these speeds (obviously in a controlled environment, blah, blah, blah) you might think the SRV could become unstable, well you’re all wrong. It’s as stable as Brad Pitt’s marriage to ol’ suction lips and probably more exciting to ride, all thanks to Aprilia’s racing pedigree and therefore the SRV’s massive frame and swing-arm, which allows the SRV to generate an amazing 45-degree lean angle. I know it’s a long thing but it is sooooo easy to ride in all areas. Want to go touring, drag race from the lights, cruise past a posh café, or maybe just scare a pillion? Then buy the SRV850!
Whilst one is wafting past GS1200 Adventure bikes, which I did in a most pleasurable manner as he was doing a mere 190km/h full of top boxes and shite, one might think this 249kg mega-scoot won’t stop, but you’d be wrong again folks. It has massive 300mm twin discs with Brembo bits to match and ABS for those with a feeble hand, bless.
There’s no point in even mentioning comfort levels because, well, just look at the thing! Sit in, lean back, put your feet up forward and you’re off as the automatic transmission does its thing. It is a slightly weird experience as the rev-counter immediately goes to 6,000rpm and stays there while the speedo carries on climbing. In fact both the engine and gearbox rotate in the opposite direction to the wheels to reduce inertia and improve the overall ride and the final drive is by a fat chain because all the CVT stuff is inside and centralised around the big V-twin –clever that.
So any faults then, I hear you shout? Well yes there is one. It is heavy on fuel when ridden, ahem, like this, but you don’t buy a Porsche and moan about petrol usage do you, so who cares? Telling people you have the world’s fastest scooter and then proving it to them is a mind trip that I enjoyed more than finding Jessica Biel still in my garage, and then some, and what a pity the SVR has become a bike ‘we used to sell’. However, you can buy this very clean used example from the guys below for only R90,000, which is an absolute bargain for what you get. Go and test ride it today at www.fourwaysmotorcycles.co.za
